If you want to try to increase the chances of having a boy or a girl, sometimes it all comes down to how you do it – literally. While there is no 100% method that will guarantee that you can select the gender of your child, there are specific positions that you can try that will increase the likelihood of selecting the gender.
This works for a variety of different reasons, but is based in the fact that the two kinds of chromosomes that are responsible for gender selection are carried by sperm that are very different. The Y chromosome is responsible for conceiving a boy. The sperm that carry this chromosome are small, quick and able to cover the distance to the egg very rapidly. The downside is they don't live very long and if they have to swim too far, they won't be able to complete their journey successfully.
The X chromosome sperm are responsible for conceiving a girl. These sperm are much larger, and move quite a bit slower. However, they live a lot longer and have more endurance when it comes to reaching the egg.
Here's what you need to know when it comes to picking positions to pick gender.
How to Have a Boy
Because the Y sperm need a little extra help in reaching their destination before they expire, positions that allow deep penetration are essential. The goal is to have the man orgasm as closely as possible to the neck of the cervix. This reduces the amount of time that the sperm will need to spend getting to the egg.
Positions that allow for this to occur include woman dominant, or woman on top as well as its other variation, commonly called Reverse Cowgirl. In these positions, the woman is astride the man and can control how deeply he penetrates her. At the moment of orgasm, the woman should allow the man inside as deeply as possible.
There are a few other positions as well, but the important thing to remember is that the deeper the penetration at the moment of orgasm, the more likely you are to have a boy.
How to Have a Girl
If you would prefer to have a girl, the proper positions involve much shallower penetration. The X sperm are much more durable and need a little more time to reach the egg, allowing the Y sperm to die off before they get there. This means that the man should orgasm as far away from the neck of the cervix as possible.
Positions for shallow penetration include missionary, spooning and the lotus position where the couple wrap their legs around each other while sitting. The positions do not allow for deep penetration and the desired result of increasing the likelihood of having a girl can be achieved.
Don't Forget
There is one more thing to remember when choosing a position for choosing gender. If you do want to have a boy, it is important that the woman orgasm before the man. This changes the PH near the cervix, making it more hospitable to the Y sperm. The opposite is true if you want to have a girl.
Monday, 28 February 2011
Sunday, 27 February 2011
Dietary Choices May Impact the Gender of Your Child
While there are many different things that can decide the gender of your future child, the dietary choices you make may have a big impact. Natural gender selection relies on a few different techniques to help increase the odds of having either a boy or a girl. While these methods are not 100% reliable, most couples find that they do end up with the gender they wanted. At the end of the day, it is a 50/50 chance, but there are a few things you can do to swing the percentage in your favor.
The foods that you eat can affect the future gender of your child for a variety of different reasons. The main one is that your body's PH needs to be at a certain level for each type of gender. The sperm that carry the chromosomes that decide gender require a different PH for a successful trip towards fertilization.
Let's take a look at the differences in these sperm to gain a better understanding of why PH levels are so important. First, the sperm responsible for conceiving a boy carry the Y chromosome. They are small, agile and must reach their destination quickly before they expire. They need an alkaline environment to reach the egg properly.
The sperm responsible for conceiving a girl carry the X chromosome. They are much larger, more durable and though they may take longer to reach an egg, they have a greater chance of living long enough to do so. They prosper in an acidic environment.
Choosing the right foods to balance your PH levels appropriately may indeed have an impact on the gender of your child. Let's take a look at what foods are important to include in your diet for either sex.
Eating for a Boy
If you want to have a boy, foods that contain potassium and sodium are very important. They are non acidic by nature and will boost your alkalinity. The recommended foods include bananas, sweet corn, red meats, and even sausages. It is important however that you eat these foods in moderation and include a healthy and balanced diet for proper health. Having too much sodium is never recommended. Stay within proper dietary guidelines at all times.
Eating for a Girl
In order to have a girl, you need to focus on foods that will boost acidity in your body. They include foods that are rich in magnesium and calcium. Broccoli is the perfect example of a food that contains high levels of both. Other foods you can eat include grapefruit, apples, dairy products, some fish (farm raised to avoid high levels of mercury) and leafy green vegetables.
What to Remember
Everything in moderation is key as well as proper nutrition. While there are other methods of selecting your child's gender naturally, combining them with a proper diet will increase your chances for success. Ask your doctor if you have any questions about the foods that you should be eating.
The foods that you eat can affect the future gender of your child for a variety of different reasons. The main one is that your body's PH needs to be at a certain level for each type of gender. The sperm that carry the chromosomes that decide gender require a different PH for a successful trip towards fertilization.
Let's take a look at the differences in these sperm to gain a better understanding of why PH levels are so important. First, the sperm responsible for conceiving a boy carry the Y chromosome. They are small, agile and must reach their destination quickly before they expire. They need an alkaline environment to reach the egg properly.
The sperm responsible for conceiving a girl carry the X chromosome. They are much larger, more durable and though they may take longer to reach an egg, they have a greater chance of living long enough to do so. They prosper in an acidic environment.
Choosing the right foods to balance your PH levels appropriately may indeed have an impact on the gender of your child. Let's take a look at what foods are important to include in your diet for either sex.
Eating for a Boy
If you want to have a boy, foods that contain potassium and sodium are very important. They are non acidic by nature and will boost your alkalinity. The recommended foods include bananas, sweet corn, red meats, and even sausages. It is important however that you eat these foods in moderation and include a healthy and balanced diet for proper health. Having too much sodium is never recommended. Stay within proper dietary guidelines at all times.
Eating for a Girl
In order to have a girl, you need to focus on foods that will boost acidity in your body. They include foods that are rich in magnesium and calcium. Broccoli is the perfect example of a food that contains high levels of both. Other foods you can eat include grapefruit, apples, dairy products, some fish (farm raised to avoid high levels of mercury) and leafy green vegetables.
What to Remember
Everything in moderation is key as well as proper nutrition. While there are other methods of selecting your child's gender naturally, combining them with a proper diet will increase your chances for success. Ask your doctor if you have any questions about the foods that you should be eating.
Saturday, 26 February 2011
Timing Intercourse to Choose the Gender of Your Child
While there are no guarantees when it comes to natural gender selection, there are a few things that can be done to increase the likelihood of having a little boy or a little girl. If you are specifically wanting a boy or girl, it certainly doesn’t hurt to try a few natural techniques. You may not get the gender you want, but it sure is fun trying and the result is the same regardless – a happy and healthy baby, and that is what really matters.
In order to understand how the timing of when you have sex can impact the gender of your child it is important to look at two different things – first, how ovulation works and second, how the differences in sperm affect this timing. Let's look at ovulation first.
Every month, there is a window of fertility that is approximately five days long. Three days prior to ovulation to one day following ovulation are the best times to conceive. Remember, the egg only has 24 hours of viability, and that sperm can live for up to five days in the reproductive tract. Each woman is different however, but this is the generally accepted "window of fertility" that occurs every month.
So, now that you've narrowed it down to five days of the month where you are fertile, it's time to figure out how to time your intercourse to choose the gender of your child. Let's take a look at the differences in sperm that carry the chromosomes that decide gender.
A sperm carrying the Y chromosome will result in a boy if it successfully fertilizes the egg. A sperm carrying the X chromosome will result in a girl. There are some main differences in these sperm that are important to understand. The Y sperm are very small, but also very quick and agile. The main downside is that they don't live very long. The X sperm are bigger and much slower, but on the flip side, they live a lot longer.
Keeping this in mind, now let's move to timing. In order to have a boy, it is vital to allow the Y sperm the time they need to reach the egg as quickly as possible. This means that you need to time intercourse on the day that you ovulate. The Y sperm won't live much longer than that 24 hour period that the egg is viable and you need to give them that chance to meet the egg before they expire.
On the other hand, if you want to have a girl, you should time intercourse to two to three days prior to ovulation. During this time, the Y sperm will have died out, leaving the slower but more durable X sperm behind. This greatly increases the chances that you will have a girl.
There are many other factors that can effect the gender of your child such as diet, and even the sexual position that you use, but timing it properly can help you naturally select your child's gender.
In order to understand how the timing of when you have sex can impact the gender of your child it is important to look at two different things – first, how ovulation works and second, how the differences in sperm affect this timing. Let's look at ovulation first.
Every month, there is a window of fertility that is approximately five days long. Three days prior to ovulation to one day following ovulation are the best times to conceive. Remember, the egg only has 24 hours of viability, and that sperm can live for up to five days in the reproductive tract. Each woman is different however, but this is the generally accepted "window of fertility" that occurs every month.
So, now that you've narrowed it down to five days of the month where you are fertile, it's time to figure out how to time your intercourse to choose the gender of your child. Let's take a look at the differences in sperm that carry the chromosomes that decide gender.
A sperm carrying the Y chromosome will result in a boy if it successfully fertilizes the egg. A sperm carrying the X chromosome will result in a girl. There are some main differences in these sperm that are important to understand. The Y sperm are very small, but also very quick and agile. The main downside is that they don't live very long. The X sperm are bigger and much slower, but on the flip side, they live a lot longer.
Keeping this in mind, now let's move to timing. In order to have a boy, it is vital to allow the Y sperm the time they need to reach the egg as quickly as possible. This means that you need to time intercourse on the day that you ovulate. The Y sperm won't live much longer than that 24 hour period that the egg is viable and you need to give them that chance to meet the egg before they expire.
On the other hand, if you want to have a girl, you should time intercourse to two to three days prior to ovulation. During this time, the Y sperm will have died out, leaving the slower but more durable X sperm behind. This greatly increases the chances that you will have a girl.
There are many other factors that can effect the gender of your child such as diet, and even the sexual position that you use, but timing it properly can help you naturally select your child's gender.
Friday, 25 February 2011
Selecting the Gender of Your Future Child
While there are many debates over how ethical it is to choose the gender of your child before they are born, the fact remains that there are some natural methods you can use that will increase the likelihood of having a child of a specific gender. The ethics of it are up to you and while no method is 100% accurate, there are a few things that you can try that will help you increase your chances for having either a boy or a girl.
These methods are centered around the fact that the sperm who carry Y chromosomes (which are necessary for a boy) are very different from the sperm that carry the X chromosome (which are necessary for a girl). By understanding these differences, and choosing the right methods, you are creating an environment where one type of sperm can outshine the other and reach the main destination first. Let's take a look at what you can do.
The Right Diet
Y sperm require an enivornment that is alkalai in nature, while X sperm need more acid. The PH levels of your body determine how thick the cervical discharge is and whether or not the desired sperm will be able to get through successfully. In order to have a girl, you need to eat a diet that is rich in calcium and magnesium. In order to have a boy, a diet rich in potassium and sodium is required.
The Right Time
The timing of when you have intercourse can greatly affect the gender of your child. Because the Y sperm need to reach the egg as quickly as possible, it is necessary to time intercourse to the day that you ovulate to increase your chances of having a boy. They will be able to reach the egg while it and they are still viable.
But in order to have a girl, you need to give the Y sperm time to die off, leaving the more durable X sperm behind. This means that you will need to time intercourse to approximately two to three days before ovulation. This gives the X sperm more than enough time to reach the egg.
The Right Position
The position you choose for intercourse can also determine the sex of your child. Once again, we fall back to the differences between sperm. The Y sperm need to reach their destination in as little time as possible. This means that they need to be released as close to the cervix as possible, shortening the trip they must take to the egg. Positions that allow for deep penetration are ideal.
In order to have a girl, you need to make it more difficult for the Y sperm to reach their target on time. This means that positions where shallow penetration is achieved are necessary. The sperm will be deposited further away from the cervix, giving the X sperm the chance they need to reach the egg, and allowing the Y sperm to die off.
These methods are centered around the fact that the sperm who carry Y chromosomes (which are necessary for a boy) are very different from the sperm that carry the X chromosome (which are necessary for a girl). By understanding these differences, and choosing the right methods, you are creating an environment where one type of sperm can outshine the other and reach the main destination first. Let's take a look at what you can do.
The Right Diet
Y sperm require an enivornment that is alkalai in nature, while X sperm need more acid. The PH levels of your body determine how thick the cervical discharge is and whether or not the desired sperm will be able to get through successfully. In order to have a girl, you need to eat a diet that is rich in calcium and magnesium. In order to have a boy, a diet rich in potassium and sodium is required.
The Right Time
The timing of when you have intercourse can greatly affect the gender of your child. Because the Y sperm need to reach the egg as quickly as possible, it is necessary to time intercourse to the day that you ovulate to increase your chances of having a boy. They will be able to reach the egg while it and they are still viable.
But in order to have a girl, you need to give the Y sperm time to die off, leaving the more durable X sperm behind. This means that you will need to time intercourse to approximately two to three days before ovulation. This gives the X sperm more than enough time to reach the egg.
The Right Position
The position you choose for intercourse can also determine the sex of your child. Once again, we fall back to the differences between sperm. The Y sperm need to reach their destination in as little time as possible. This means that they need to be released as close to the cervix as possible, shortening the trip they must take to the egg. Positions that allow for deep penetration are ideal.
In order to have a girl, you need to make it more difficult for the Y sperm to reach their target on time. This means that positions where shallow penetration is achieved are necessary. The sperm will be deposited further away from the cervix, giving the X sperm the chance they need to reach the egg, and allowing the Y sperm to die off.
Thursday, 24 February 2011
Can You Really Choose Your Baby's Gender?
Gender selection of children is a controversial topic, particularly in terms of genetic therapy and the ethics of picking the sex of your child. While there certainly have been advances in the field of genetics, there are actually some natural and completely ethical things that you can do that will increase the likelihood of selecting a gender for your child.
While no method is 100% accurate, if you are determined to have a boy or a girl, there are a few things that can be done to significantly increase your chances of conceiving the gender of your choice. Remember, the most important thing is to have a healthy baby, regardless of their gender. But if you do want to try to pick the gender of your child, it is possible. Here's what you need to know.
Differences in Sperm
The sperm that carry the Y chromosome are the "boy" sperms, while the ones that carry the X chromosome are the "girl" sperms. The Y sperm are faster, smaller, more agile but they do not last as long as the "girl" sperm. The X sperm are bigger and move quite slowly. In addition to their overall speed, they have different preferences in terms of the acidity of the vagina and cervix. An X sperm does better in an acidic environment while the Y sperm prefer an alkaline environment.
How These Differences Affect Conception
Now that we have established the differences between the sperm that carry different chromosomes, it is important to understand how these differences can be used for natural gender selection. Once you have this information, you can begin trying to conceive a child that will be a specific gender.
If you want to have a boy, the timing is crucial. Since these sperm do not live long, it is vital to time your intercourse as closely to ovulation as possible. This gives the Y sperm time to reach the egg before the X sperm do, increasing the chances that you will have a boy.
If you want to have a girl, you need to give the X sperm plenty of time to reach the egg. Since they live longer, this means that you want to time intercourse a few days before expected ovulation. By the time you ovulate, the Y sperm will have already died off, leaving only the X sperm behind. They will have the time needed to travel up through the cervix to reach the egg and fertilize it.
Click Here!
While no method is 100% accurate, if you are determined to have a boy or a girl, there are a few things that can be done to significantly increase your chances of conceiving the gender of your choice. Remember, the most important thing is to have a healthy baby, regardless of their gender. But if you do want to try to pick the gender of your child, it is possible. Here's what you need to know.
Differences in Sperm
The sperm that carry the Y chromosome are the "boy" sperms, while the ones that carry the X chromosome are the "girl" sperms. The Y sperm are faster, smaller, more agile but they do not last as long as the "girl" sperm. The X sperm are bigger and move quite slowly. In addition to their overall speed, they have different preferences in terms of the acidity of the vagina and cervix. An X sperm does better in an acidic environment while the Y sperm prefer an alkaline environment.
How These Differences Affect Conception
Now that we have established the differences between the sperm that carry different chromosomes, it is important to understand how these differences can be used for natural gender selection. Once you have this information, you can begin trying to conceive a child that will be a specific gender.
If you want to have a boy, the timing is crucial. Since these sperm do not live long, it is vital to time your intercourse as closely to ovulation as possible. This gives the Y sperm time to reach the egg before the X sperm do, increasing the chances that you will have a boy.
If you want to have a girl, you need to give the X sperm plenty of time to reach the egg. Since they live longer, this means that you want to time intercourse a few days before expected ovulation. By the time you ovulate, the Y sperm will have already died off, leaving only the X sperm behind. They will have the time needed to travel up through the cervix to reach the egg and fertilize it.
Click Here!
Tuesday, 8 February 2011
Tips For A Healthy Pregnancy
Giving birth will no doubt be one of the most magical moments of your life and to ensure that your child is strong and happy, it is important you do all you can to have a healthy pregnancy. To help you and your baby on your way, this article has compiled a number of tips that are guaranteed to make those nine pregnancy months the best they can be!
The first thing you must do when you find you are pregnant is to visit an obstetrician/gynecologist (OBGYN). They will give you an ultrasound to see how far along you are and whether your pregnancy appears to be normal. This stage is crucial and it is important not to leave this too late.
After this, you must begin to change your lifestyle. Remember, you are no longer eating and exercising for yourself but for two! Firstly, if you are a smoker or a drinker, you must quit. Cigarette smoke can lead to low birth weight in babies as well as miscarriages and tubal pregnancies so try to avoid second hand smoke as it is not conducive to a healthy pregnancy. The same can be said for alcohol and other toxic chemicals and substances such as paint fumes. These items are both damaging to the mother and to the pregnancy.
Another part of changing your lifestyle is your diet during pregnancy. Make sure to drink plenty of water – about 6 to 8 glasses a day. It is not healthy to be overweight or underweight during a pregnancy but do remember that you shouldn’t diet during pregnancy. Pregnancy is not a time to be worrying about your weight! Don’t skip meals as you and your baby need as much nutrition and calories as possible, although not the fattening kind so make sure you get a balance. Junk food is great to satisfy those crazy pregnancy cravings but try not to go overboard!
If you are worried about weight gain during pregnancy, a great alternative to dieting is light exercise. You may not have loved it before your pregnancy, but learn to love it now as it will definitely pay off in the long run by keeping your baby healthy and your body fit. Light exercises will not harm your pregnancy so try swimming, yoga and walking.
An additional healthy pregnancy tip that those with busy schedules tend to forget is the importance of sleep. Make sure to get plenty of rest so that you and your baby can recuperate and to ensure that your immune system is as strong as possible. It is advised that you rest on your side to reduce swelling and generate the best circulation to your baby.
To recap: avoid damaging substances such as nicotine and alcohol, don’t diet during pregnancy, drink plenty of water, practice as much exercise as safely possible, and get plenty of sleep! Following these pregnancy tips will make certain that you have a healthy pregnancy and have a happy and fit child.
The first thing you must do when you find you are pregnant is to visit an obstetrician/gynecologist (OBGYN). They will give you an ultrasound to see how far along you are and whether your pregnancy appears to be normal. This stage is crucial and it is important not to leave this too late.
After this, you must begin to change your lifestyle. Remember, you are no longer eating and exercising for yourself but for two! Firstly, if you are a smoker or a drinker, you must quit. Cigarette smoke can lead to low birth weight in babies as well as miscarriages and tubal pregnancies so try to avoid second hand smoke as it is not conducive to a healthy pregnancy. The same can be said for alcohol and other toxic chemicals and substances such as paint fumes. These items are both damaging to the mother and to the pregnancy.
Another part of changing your lifestyle is your diet during pregnancy. Make sure to drink plenty of water – about 6 to 8 glasses a day. It is not healthy to be overweight or underweight during a pregnancy but do remember that you shouldn’t diet during pregnancy. Pregnancy is not a time to be worrying about your weight! Don’t skip meals as you and your baby need as much nutrition and calories as possible, although not the fattening kind so make sure you get a balance. Junk food is great to satisfy those crazy pregnancy cravings but try not to go overboard!
If you are worried about weight gain during pregnancy, a great alternative to dieting is light exercise. You may not have loved it before your pregnancy, but learn to love it now as it will definitely pay off in the long run by keeping your baby healthy and your body fit. Light exercises will not harm your pregnancy so try swimming, yoga and walking.
An additional healthy pregnancy tip that those with busy schedules tend to forget is the importance of sleep. Make sure to get plenty of rest so that you and your baby can recuperate and to ensure that your immune system is as strong as possible. It is advised that you rest on your side to reduce swelling and generate the best circulation to your baby.
To recap: avoid damaging substances such as nicotine and alcohol, don’t diet during pregnancy, drink plenty of water, practice as much exercise as safely possible, and get plenty of sleep! Following these pregnancy tips will make certain that you have a healthy pregnancy and have a happy and fit child.
Friday, 4 February 2011
Natural Healing Herbs For Infertility
Next generation is signaled when a new life comes. Its every couples dream that they have someone who they can see grow up they same way they themselves grew up. It happens some times that couples how much ever they wish to, cannot give birth to new life. This is mainly due to infertility causing either the female or male to not be able to complete the process. The reasons for this are many. Males can have infertility due to low sperm count, deficient sexual activities & circulation problems. For females the reasons could be due to endometriosis, polycystic ovarian syndrome, obesity in addition to some problems related to ovarian.
The attempts to resolve the matter is done by either by acupuncture, mineral & vitamin supplements and induction of herbs having fertility power. Vitamins are of vital importance in this context and an equal significance should be given to correct mineral content in a human’s body. We have enlisted a few methods for both females and males that might be of help to you.
Female Infertility: This applies to all and one, the significance of minerals and vitamins should never be underestimated and when taken with herbal medication their potency surges. Deficiency of vitamins & iron may lead to woman being infertile. Intake shall help in fight infertility. Women who are undergoing Clomiphene fertility medication should also consume Vitamin C as it raises the probability of conceiving. Vitamin E consumption by females raises production of female hormone. Licorice root, Dong quai, royal jelly extract, wild yam, panax ginseng are good when being used with formulas for fertility. A significant reason for sterility is endometriosis and can be challenged via proper diet consumption, by certain intake of herbs like budrock root, dong quai, alfala, red raspberry leaf & red clover which can be termed to be a woman’s herb nutrients provider, hormone-balancing phytoestrogens & trace minerals and physical care. One more formula for helping is false unicorn root, damiana, gotu kola, dong quai ginseng, wild yam root & licorice root.
Male Infertility: For men vitamin C raises production of sperm, the sperm’s mobility and makes the flow like a river instead of being a pond. Vitamin C deals with impotency too. While vitamin E gives thrust to production of hormones adding to ones sex wish list. It doubles up by providing oxygen to the organs that reproduce, giving impetus to potency. The Mexican herb - Damiana is a common medication for purpose of sex and at the same time it raises the sperm count and keep the mood lively. The same effect can be derived from astragalus root, L-arginine, panax ginseng, sarsaparilla. The Chinese ancient tree extract of Ginkgo Biloba is also very useful for this purpose and has many other benefits that make it an ideal choice.
These herbs are all useful but there is no substitute for a proper diet, the consumption of vitamins and minerals, an active physical life along with good balanced weight can help you avoid these circumstances and help maintain longevity in reproductive system.
Wednesday, 2 February 2011
The New Kid on the Block: 30 Years and Growing
When couples attend Pink Kit classes, they often ask, “Why should we be preparing for birth? We’ve made our birth plan and chosen our care provider.” What is important is that the women is driving the car, not just taking a journey by car, which can imply she is the passenger. What we’re trying to get people to understand is that developing birthing skills is a necessity just like learning to drive a car. These couples include people planning homebirths with independent midwives and people planning hospital births with continuity of care team midwives or a GP or obstetrical specialist. Common Knowledge Trust (CKT) has discovered that analogies may help answer this question.
The Journey
First, we tell them labour is like taking an unknown journey by car. Even if you’ve taken this road before, each journey is different and unknown. It can be very strenuous and demanding. It might be long. You might get tired. Someone or a few people might accompany you. Throughout this journey, others might try to help you out in order to safeguard you and make certain you reach the end safely. Some professionals might suggest that you skip the journey. Circumstances might actually require you to do that. Other professionals will encourage you to take the journey because it might become a highlight of your life.
Then we ask, what is the difference between that scenario and labour? After many responses, we tell them the real difference is that you have already learned to drive a car. If you had to take such a journey and didn’t know how to drive, would you be willing to spend eight to 12 weeks learning beforehand? Where is the birth professional in this analogy? Some are encouraging you to make the journey and others might think it’s too dangerous, or you might think you don’t need to do it, fly instead. The birth professional is usually the low or high tech mechanic.
Next, the couples talk about their relationships to the professional care provider. Their midwives are encouraging them to choose a birth plan. They have decided where to birth, and the doctors are often telling them what they need. So we present analogies to other common professional relationships. We are all passive when we go to the dentist, yet most of us take care of our teeth every day. If we took this approach to birth, we would prepare beforehand, but in the presence of the professional we would be passive. Not ideal.
Giving birth is more like learning to sing, dance, paint, throw pots or play an instrument. We probably seek a professional teacher. Yet we have to do the work to learn, as well as show the teacher our progress. If we took this approach to birth, then the birth professionals would be our musical instrument instructors, yet even midwives don’t often take that role. The Pink Kit is the driving lessons, so this analogy still doesn’t give us a clear understanding of what other similar professional relationship is like labour and being cared for.
By the time the class works through all the analogies, the couples begin to understand: only the woman is going to labour. The father, partner, friend or relative is there to help her on the journey, which will occur around and through whatever professional care they receive.
The Kit
Since The Pink Kit information developed in the U.S. in the late 1970s and 1980s, thousands of couples have used the preparation and then laboured in hospital. Having done the preparation ahead of time, the couples work together with directed breathing; they use positions that keep the woman open. There is been a great deal of ‘best positions’ that have been theoretical and not worked for women, because they didn’t know enough about their bony structure or how the muscles reacted to positions. They do hip lifts and sit-bone spreads and carry out sacral rocking so their sacrum is mobile. This developed instead of the counter pressure on the sacrum that closes the space the baby needs, although it relieves the back pain. Learning to keep the sacrum mobile, gives the baby room and the woman relieved regardless of assessments, monitoring or other procedures going on around them. They just go on working through the process of labour. Staff and doctors often comment on what a “good labour” they had. “Weren’t they lucky? One woman responded: “I wanted to grab that person by the neck and shout, 'You don’t know how hard We worked for that good birth!'”
The Skills
When we ask couples what their mothers and fathers taught them about managing labour, most say: “Nothing,” “Not much,” or “It hurts, you’ll get through it.” If they haven’t been taught by their mothers and fathers how to manage labour, where are they getting the information, and how useful is it?
Whenever people need to accomplish a new task, it’s vitally important that they learn appropriate skills and then apply them. Because so few people have been at births, they have no idea what appropriate skills are. If a woman perceives her contractions as manageable, she will use her breath sustainably, create self-relaxation responses, get into” labour and accept the process. If she perceives them as painful or very, very painful, she will respond with ragged breathing, tensing her body and using other struggling behaviours. What CKT is teaching expectant couples (lessons they will eventually teach their own children) are the sustainable behaviours they can put into place regardless of the woman’s perception, particularly when she does feel her labour to be “painful
The fact is that these are the universal skills that any woman can use, not just another ‘theory’ or ‘technique’. People are continually saying that what they learned in ‘childbirth education’ classes went out the window, which means, to date, those skills aren’t universal enough or not useable. Why would a woman want to respond to labour with frantic behaviour? It’s the lack of appropriately learned skills.
As women learn these appropriate skills and apply them to the task, there is more consistency in how women respond to the process of labour and how their partners can help them stay on a sustainable behaviour track. Because labours are so similar, we can define, hear, see, experience, practice, model, remind, encourage, remember and know appropriate responses to the experience. A woman who is struggling with labour may hold her breath or scream, groan and moan, whereas a woman who is managing her responses to the sensations will tend to breathe in through her nose and out through either her nose or mouth in a manner that sounds “right.” Because most people have no idea what sounds right, we have to show them so they can develop the skills.
We ask fathers or the support people to look at the woman’s face and forehead when she is relaxed during labour . Usually when relaxed, a person’s forehead is smooth. When a woman wrinkles her forehead in labour, the father understands that her internal sensations are intense, and he can observe whether she is responding to them with tension. He can then help her reduce the tension using “common body language” or “common body touch.” If she is breathing more raggedly, he can model directed breathing to remind her to use breath as a focus.
If the partner sees the woman standing on her toes, with shoulders around her ears and bum muscles tight, a father working with The Pink Kit is less likely to tell her to relax, drop her shoulders or come off her toes. Using his skills and knowledge, he’ll just tell her to relax inside the pelvic clock and minnie mouse muscles (her bum muscles). She’ll know what he is talking about. She would have done that herself, except the sensations were a bit too much at the time. She still might not like the experience, but she’ll love how she managed herself. She’ll love her partner for knowing specifically what she needed to do rather than giving her a general direction that could elicit: “I’m trying to relax!” “Shut up!” or “You try!”
One woman said after her birth: “Before each contraction, I set up my directed breathing. The contractions were fine. So I thought to myself, ‘maybe the breathing has nothing to do with it,’ and I just let the next contraction happen. It was off the planet in intensity. What scared me was that it took me four to five more contractions to get it back.”
What the statistics (on our website) don’t show is how empowered both mothers and fathers feel; that the woman knew she could turn to her partner for the coaching skills; that their partnering and parenting relationships are enriched.
There is no doubt that if we had all been at 100 births, we would see and hear which mannerisms are sustainable and which indicate that a woman is struggling with her perception of the experience. But the skills haven’t been passed on generation to generation. Common Knowledge Trust wants that to change. All the couples who use these resources tell us the same thing—they will pass the knowledge on to their sons and daughters. Women will labour, whether at home, in hospital, with a midwife, with a doctor, whether having a natural or a medical birth. Skills work well in all situations.
Knowledge is power. It reduces fears, increases confidence, builds skills and encourages conscious response rather than impulsive reaction to an intense experience. It develops a strong and deeply personal sense of accomplishment for both women and men. Most important, we’ll pass it on to our children.
The Journey
First, we tell them labour is like taking an unknown journey by car. Even if you’ve taken this road before, each journey is different and unknown. It can be very strenuous and demanding. It might be long. You might get tired. Someone or a few people might accompany you. Throughout this journey, others might try to help you out in order to safeguard you and make certain you reach the end safely. Some professionals might suggest that you skip the journey. Circumstances might actually require you to do that. Other professionals will encourage you to take the journey because it might become a highlight of your life.
Then we ask, what is the difference between that scenario and labour? After many responses, we tell them the real difference is that you have already learned to drive a car. If you had to take such a journey and didn’t know how to drive, would you be willing to spend eight to 12 weeks learning beforehand? Where is the birth professional in this analogy? Some are encouraging you to make the journey and others might think it’s too dangerous, or you might think you don’t need to do it, fly instead. The birth professional is usually the low or high tech mechanic.
Next, the couples talk about their relationships to the professional care provider. Their midwives are encouraging them to choose a birth plan. They have decided where to birth, and the doctors are often telling them what they need. So we present analogies to other common professional relationships. We are all passive when we go to the dentist, yet most of us take care of our teeth every day. If we took this approach to birth, we would prepare beforehand, but in the presence of the professional we would be passive. Not ideal.
Giving birth is more like learning to sing, dance, paint, throw pots or play an instrument. We probably seek a professional teacher. Yet we have to do the work to learn, as well as show the teacher our progress. If we took this approach to birth, then the birth professionals would be our musical instrument instructors, yet even midwives don’t often take that role. The Pink Kit is the driving lessons, so this analogy still doesn’t give us a clear understanding of what other similar professional relationship is like labour and being cared for.
By the time the class works through all the analogies, the couples begin to understand: only the woman is going to labour. The father, partner, friend or relative is there to help her on the journey, which will occur around and through whatever professional care they receive.
The Kit
Since The Pink Kit information developed in the U.S. in the late 1970s and 1980s, thousands of couples have used the preparation and then laboured in hospital. Having done the preparation ahead of time, the couples work together with directed breathing; they use positions that keep the woman open. There is been a great deal of ‘best positions’ that have been theoretical and not worked for women, because they didn’t know enough about their bony structure or how the muscles reacted to positions. They do hip lifts and sit-bone spreads and carry out sacral rocking so their sacrum is mobile. This developed instead of the counter pressure on the sacrum that closes the space the baby needs, although it relieves the back pain. Learning to keep the sacrum mobile, gives the baby room and the woman relieved regardless of assessments, monitoring or other procedures going on around them. They just go on working through the process of labour. Staff and doctors often comment on what a “good labour” they had. “Weren’t they lucky? One woman responded: “I wanted to grab that person by the neck and shout, 'You don’t know how hard We worked for that good birth!'”
The Skills
When we ask couples what their mothers and fathers taught them about managing labour, most say: “Nothing,” “Not much,” or “It hurts, you’ll get through it.” If they haven’t been taught by their mothers and fathers how to manage labour, where are they getting the information, and how useful is it?
Whenever people need to accomplish a new task, it’s vitally important that they learn appropriate skills and then apply them. Because so few people have been at births, they have no idea what appropriate skills are. If a woman perceives her contractions as manageable, she will use her breath sustainably, create self-relaxation responses, get into” labour and accept the process. If she perceives them as painful or very, very painful, she will respond with ragged breathing, tensing her body and using other struggling behaviours. What CKT is teaching expectant couples (lessons they will eventually teach their own children) are the sustainable behaviours they can put into place regardless of the woman’s perception, particularly when she does feel her labour to be “painful
The fact is that these are the universal skills that any woman can use, not just another ‘theory’ or ‘technique’. People are continually saying that what they learned in ‘childbirth education’ classes went out the window, which means, to date, those skills aren’t universal enough or not useable. Why would a woman want to respond to labour with frantic behaviour? It’s the lack of appropriately learned skills.
As women learn these appropriate skills and apply them to the task, there is more consistency in how women respond to the process of labour and how their partners can help them stay on a sustainable behaviour track. Because labours are so similar, we can define, hear, see, experience, practice, model, remind, encourage, remember and know appropriate responses to the experience. A woman who is struggling with labour may hold her breath or scream, groan and moan, whereas a woman who is managing her responses to the sensations will tend to breathe in through her nose and out through either her nose or mouth in a manner that sounds “right.” Because most people have no idea what sounds right, we have to show them so they can develop the skills.
We ask fathers or the support people to look at the woman’s face and forehead when she is relaxed during labour . Usually when relaxed, a person’s forehead is smooth. When a woman wrinkles her forehead in labour, the father understands that her internal sensations are intense, and he can observe whether she is responding to them with tension. He can then help her reduce the tension using “common body language” or “common body touch.” If she is breathing more raggedly, he can model directed breathing to remind her to use breath as a focus.
If the partner sees the woman standing on her toes, with shoulders around her ears and bum muscles tight, a father working with The Pink Kit is less likely to tell her to relax, drop her shoulders or come off her toes. Using his skills and knowledge, he’ll just tell her to relax inside the pelvic clock and minnie mouse muscles (her bum muscles). She’ll know what he is talking about. She would have done that herself, except the sensations were a bit too much at the time. She still might not like the experience, but she’ll love how she managed herself. She’ll love her partner for knowing specifically what she needed to do rather than giving her a general direction that could elicit: “I’m trying to relax!” “Shut up!” or “You try!”
One woman said after her birth: “Before each contraction, I set up my directed breathing. The contractions were fine. So I thought to myself, ‘maybe the breathing has nothing to do with it,’ and I just let the next contraction happen. It was off the planet in intensity. What scared me was that it took me four to five more contractions to get it back.”
What the statistics (on our website) don’t show is how empowered both mothers and fathers feel; that the woman knew she could turn to her partner for the coaching skills; that their partnering and parenting relationships are enriched.
There is no doubt that if we had all been at 100 births, we would see and hear which mannerisms are sustainable and which indicate that a woman is struggling with her perception of the experience. But the skills haven’t been passed on generation to generation. Common Knowledge Trust wants that to change. All the couples who use these resources tell us the same thing—they will pass the knowledge on to their sons and daughters. Women will labour, whether at home, in hospital, with a midwife, with a doctor, whether having a natural or a medical birth. Skills work well in all situations.
Knowledge is power. It reduces fears, increases confidence, builds skills and encourages conscious response rather than impulsive reaction to an intense experience. It develops a strong and deeply personal sense of accomplishment for both women and men. Most important, we’ll pass it on to our children.
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